Music Monday: Something to Sing About

Music Monday!

Music can be a great source of comfort and inspiration when you’re feeling down.

Today’s song is: “Something to Sing About” from Once More With Feeling, the Buffy the Vampire Slayer musical episode.

Listen to the song here:

Lyrics:

“Life’s a show and we all play a part
And when the music starts,
We open up our hearts

It’s all right if some things come out wrong.
We’ll sing a happy song
And you can sing along.

Where’s there’s life,
There’s hope.
Everyday’s
A gift.
Wishes can
Come true.
Whistle while
You work.
So hard
All day.

To be like other girls
To fit in in this glittering world.
Don’t give me songs.
Don’t give me songs.

Give me something to sing about.
I need something to sing about.

Life’s a song
You don’t get to rehearse.
And every single verse
Can make it that much worse.

Still my friends
Don’t know why I ignore
The million things or more
I should be dancing for.

All the joy
Life sends.
Family
And friends.
All the twists
And bends
Knowing that
It ends.
Well that
Depends…

On if they let you go,
On if they know enough to know

That when you bow
You leave the crowd.

There was no pain,
No fear, no doubt
Till they pulled me out
Of heaven.

So that’s my refrain.
I live in hell
’Cause I’ve been expelled
From heaven.
I think I was in heaven.

So give me something to sing about.
Please give me something.

Life’s not a song.
Life isn’t bliss.
Life is just this.
It’s living.
You’ll get along.
The pain that you feel
Only can heal
By living.
You have to go on living.
So that one of us is living.”

Why this song’s so cool:  Sure – let’s do another Buffy song.  Because they’re great!

Everyone feels like they’re just faking their way through life, hoping nobody notices we’re all just big frauds with no clue what we’re doing. When this feeling gets to be too overwhelming, we can get a bit frantic and spin out of control as we try to grasp anything to hold on to. Buffy LITERALLY spins out of control and almost combusts. But she is saved from an unexpected source, Spike. Which is great because sometimes you can’t predict who or what is going to help you.

Plus I wouldn’t have wanted to see that SUPER CUTE shirt she was wearing to be destroyed.

Why this song’s helpful: Once again, Buffy expresses her struggle to fit in and be ‘normal.’ She is lost and directionless and frustrated about feeling that way when she didn’t used to feel that way.  She doesn’t know how to communicate with her friends, she doesn’t feel like they understand. In addition, she feels extremely guilty for not feeling more happy and grateful that she’s alive. She is trying so hard to focus on the positive and to find something to be happy and sing about, but it is just not working.  That’s not her fault. Sometimes you do everything right, and you still don’t succeed.  Isn’t that a Star Trek quote…? Anyway, so Buffy is trying to fake her way through her life and just pretend that she is experiencing happiness, when the reality is that she constantly feels like she is in hell, that is what depression feels like.


About the musical episode:

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0533466/

The Buffy wiki page:

http://buffy.wikia.com/wiki/Once_More,_with_Feeling

Music Monday: Going Through the Motions

Music Monday!

Music can be a great source of comfort and inspiration when you’re feeling down.

Today’s song is: “Going Through the Motions” from Once More With Feeling, the Buffy the Vampire Slayer musical episode.

Listen to the song here:

Lyrics:

“Every single night, the same arrangement,
I go out and fight the fight.
Still I always feel this strange estrangement,
Nothing here is real, nothing here is right.

I’ve been making shows of trading blows,
Just hoping no one knows,
That I’ve been going through the motions,
Walking though the part,
Nothing seems to penetrate my heart.

I was always brave and kind of righteous,
Now I find I’m wavering.
Crawl out of your grave, you find this fight
Just doesn’t mean a thing

(Henchman) She ain’t got that swing.

(Buffy) -pause- Thanks for noticing.

(Demon & Henchmen) She is pretty well with fiends from Hell
But lately we can tell
That she’s just going through the motions
Faking it somehow.

(Demon) She’s not even half the girl she…owww!

(Buffy) Will I stay this way forever?
Sleepwalk through my life’s endeavor?

(Handsome Young Man) How can I repay…?

(Buffy) Whatever!
I don’t want to be
Going through the motions,
Losing all my drive.
I can’t even see,
If this is really me,
And I just wanna be alive.”

Why this song’s so cool:  At this point in Buffy’s story line, Buffy is really struggling to readjust to ‘normalcy,’ cause… you know… she DIED.  Also, when she was dead, she was in some version of heaven.  Her friends brought her back to life because they thought she was trapped in a horrible hell dimension, but in all actuality, she was safe and at peace. It’s just a very fun song that packs an emotional punch.  It’s a great way to visualize the feelings of depression as something more tangible, even if it is fantasy-based.

Why this song’s helpful: Buffy’s feelings are so applicable to someone struggling with depression.
Season six is probably Buffy’s darkest season.  And this makes her especially relevant for those struggling with depression.  Buffy doesn’t enjoy the things she used to, she struggles accomplishing basic, everyday tasks, no one understands why she is so sad and changed and her friends want her to just get over it already.  She feels lost, alone, guilty, worthless, helpless, empty, directionless: THESE ARE LITERALLY SYMPTOMS OF DEPRESSION.  She doesn’t know who she is anymore, and that is what depression feels like.

About the musical episode:

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0533466/

The Buffy wiki page:

http://buffy.wikia.com/wiki/Once_More,_with_Feeling

Music Monday: Dark, Dark Eyes

Music Monday!

Music can be a great source of comfort and inspiration when you’re feeling down.

Today’s song is: “Dark, dark eyes” by Marian Call.

“You don’t know how lovely you are
Sweet sweet soul with dark dark eyes
Head to heel beautifully marred
Sweet sweet soul, forgive my surprise

I know you see right through me
But please don’t look away
I’ll comfort you if you’ll cling to me
We’ll cry and we’ll wait for the day

Oh, I wish you could see what I see
My sweet sweet soul
Dark dark eyes

You don’t know how dangerous you are
Sweet sweet soul with small, small hands
I’d tell you the truth, but it’s hard
Sweet sweet soul, you don’t comprehend

But I’ll sing you every known love song
Until you can sleep through the night
I’ll stay by your side if you’ll have me, love
I’ll hold you until you don’t fight

Oh, I wish you could see what I see
My sweet sweet soul
Dark dark eyes”

Why this song’s so cool:  Marian Call is a nerdy folk singer/songwriter, and she actually has a whole album just dedicated to the T.V. show FIREFLY, which is awesome!  This particular song is usually interpreted to be about River Tam.

Why this song’s helpful: Sometimes you can’t see things clearly when you’re tired or stressed or overwhelmingly sad.  Your perception of yourself and the situation become warped.  This song can remind you that others may see you differently and have a unique perspective that can be helpful to comfort you and get through your problems.  It reminds you that sometimes all you can do is hold on and weather the storm until a new day begins.   It also lets you know that your struggles are a part of what makes you who you are, and that can be beautiful and appreciated.  Also the music itself is just really soothing and calming.

Listen to the song here:

Here’s Marian Call’s website:

http://mariancall.com/

 

What to Watch When You’re Depressed. (Or Just Sad):

Sometimes when you’re depressed, all you can do is sit there.  Moving is just. too. hard.  Well, while you’re sitting there, maybe watching something on the telly will distract you somewhat from your misery.  It’s worth a try, right?

Here are my recommendations:

Most importantly: Watch movies that you love or used to love.  Bring back that lovin’ feeling.

My personal happy/helpful movies:

  • Lord of the Rings “All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us.”

    • I really, strongly identify with these movies (and books). Ordinary, non-conventional heroes (THAT’S ME!) have to do all this impossible-seeming stuff, go on a long, difficult, draining, physically and psychologically exhausting journey to a dark and horrible place. But there is a support network. And all they come back in some way or another. It is possible!  If they can do it, maybe so can I? Maybe?
    • “There and back again” – I have a framed print that says this that hangs in my room reminding me that, like Frodo and Sam, I CAN make it to Mt. Doom. And then I can even make it back home. Things will be different, but the quest to vanquish the evil thing that has taken me over does have an end.  This is where I got the name for this blog.
    • “There is some good in this world, and it’s worth fighting for.” ‘Nuff said.
    • BONUS: It’s really long, so if you feel like you can’t get up off the couch for a long period of time, that’s fine . . . you’re just having a movie marathon experience. Not moving turns into something you are doing on purpose to immerse yourself in the story, yeah, that’s it!
  • Into the Woods – “The prettier the flower, the farther from the path.”

    • Basically a giant metaphor for going through dark, scary, uncertain times and getting through it. “Everything you learn there will help when you return there.”
    • Also, freaking hilarious. How did Stephen Sondheim create such a roller coaster of emotions!?  I’m laughing out loud, then sobbing hysterically.  And it’s all relevant on so many different levels.
    • “Into the woods,
      It’s time to go,
      It may be all
      In vain, you/I know.
      Into the woods-
      But even so,
      I have to take the journey.
      Into the woods,
      Without delay,
      But careful not
      To lose the way.
      Into the woods,
      Who knows what may
      Be lurking on the journey?
      Into the woods
      To get the thing
      That makes it worth
      The journeying.”
    • Remember, NO ONE IS ALONE:
  • Howl’s Moving Castle – “They say that the best blaze burns brightest when circumstances are at their worst.”

    • What do you do when you’re suddenly different than you used to be? Are you trapped in a seemingly unsolvable or frustrating situation?  Do you feel like you’re weird and different and don’t fit in?  Need a change in environment and/or scenery? Do you feel out of sync with your identity and/or appearance?  Does your outside not match your inside?
    • IT’S JUST BEAUTIFUL AND AMAZING AND BEAUTIFUL.
  • Pride and Prejudice/Sense and Sensibility – any version – “Completely and perfectly and incandescently happy.”

    • Just take me away from this time and place where everything is horrible and bring me to the land of gentle pastels, sweeping gowns, long walks in the rain, and refined, yet sassy characters. Give me some sweet distance with a side of silliness, where the problems of the heroines are poignantly real and relatable even though they’re totally not relatable.
  • Silver Linings Playbook – “I like that. Just like all the other parts of myself.”

    • Hey, look – a movie about mental illness that isn’t dumb/condescending/a caricature. It’s real and many people struggle with it. It’s accurate, normalizing and relatable.

Whatever you watched as a child/young adult is often a good choice, because it can transport you back to a time when you were happier and not as worried.

  • Harry Potter – “Don’t let the muggles get you down.”

  • Mulan, Tangled, Anastasia, (and other Disney/animated features) – “A single grain of rice can tip the scale. One man may be the difference between victory and defeat.”

    • Again, brings you back to a simpler, happier place. Let’s get down to business… (you can finish the rest).
    • Be careful with your selections though. Maybe fast forward through that Lion King stampede scene?  And any time any characters parents die, really, which, let’s face it, is ALL THE FREAKING TIME (if they’re not dead already).

My happy/helpful T.V. shows:

  • BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER – “The hardest thing in this world is to live in it.”

    • GUYS! EVERYTHING IS JUST ONE GIANT METAPHOR FOR EVERYTHING!!!
    • Only have time for one episode? WATCH THE MUSICAL!  Season 6, episode 7: “Once More, With Feeling.”  “I touch the fire and it freezes me.  I look into it and it’s black. Why can’t I feel? My skin should crack and peel.  I want the fire back!”  Tell me that’s not about depression.
    • Only have time for one scene? THIS ONE:
      • https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FmLSjwam26E
      • “Every single night, the same arrangement,
        I go out and fight the fight. 
        Still I always feel this strange estrangement, 
        Nothing here is real, nothing here is right.
        …Will I stay this way forever?
        Sleepwalk through my life’s endeavor?
        …I don’t want to be
        Going through the motions,
        Losing all my drive.
        I can’t even see,
        If this is really me,
        And I just wanna be alive.”
  • Better Off Ted – “I wish I had the power to make everyone go away.”

    • So delightfully and ridiculously funny – Thank you, Netflix!
  • Parks and Recreation – “Everything hurts and I’m dying.” “I’m fine. It’ just that life is pointless and nothing matters and I’m always tired.” “I don’t want to do things.  I want to NOT do things.” “Sometimes you gotta work a little, so you can ball a lot.” “Treat yo’ self.” “Never half-ass two things.  Whole-ass one thing.”  “My whole life is a giant mess and I love it.”

    • Every single episode is funny. It’s optimistic but realistic.  I feel like I relate to almost EVERY character. Perfect for extracting a laugh when you didn’t know you even had one left in there.  Short and sweet and easy to fit into your schedule.

*A note about sad movie-watching – I recommend mostly happy movies, but an occasional sad movie can be cleansing and helpful in its own way.  For example – if you feel guilt or shame about crying about your own problems, it can be a way to channel those tears so they can be expressed and not built up.  Try more gentle tear-jerkers like “Titanic” rather than THERE IS NO BRIGHT SPOT ANYWHERE movies like “Schindler’s List.”