Home Is Where Your Butt Is

“Home is where the heart is.”
“Home is wherever I’m with you.”
“There’s no place like home.”
“I need you in my house, ‘cause you’re my home.”
“Home sweet home.”
“I wish I was homeward bound.”

Home is a term that is often used without really having a consistently agreed on or recognized definition – While there is no universal definition, the concept of home is still a universal theme – the idea of ‘home’ may be different for every person, but it is always important. A home SHOULD be a safe and nurturing environment, both physically and emotionally, but it is unfortunately not always so.  Even people lucky enough to have four walls and a roof may not feel safe, secure, or nurtured there – sure safe from rain probably, but that isn’t the only thing that makes a home.  And I don’t think a home needs to be a house, necessarily, although physical safety and protection are still a contributing component.

The idea of home and one’s role there is extremely prevalent in children’s literature. I recently read Fly Away Home by Eve Bunting, a children’s picture book that is about a boy and his father who are homeless and live in an airport.  While it seems that they have a pretty nurturing and safe environment both physically (with the exception of the danger of being caught and thrown out) and emotionally (they have a good relationship, friends, a support system), they are still saving up for a ‘real’ home.  At first glance it seems like it is communicating a positive message about overcoming obstacles and making a better life, but it places value on only one definition of ‘home,’ and portrays an exclusionary perspective about the homeless.

For me, I believe that a significant factor in the concept of home is the ability to be at home with oneself, within oneself, at peace and comfortable and safe.  That is a big part of my definition or interpretation of the word home.  But everyone has their own interpretation and definition, and those are constantly changing and evolving as the associated ideas and terms grow and develop.

The term ‘relationship’ isn’t often connected to a physical place.  However, relationships with places can have a significant impact on people. People usually feel the strongest relationship with the place they call home.  The home can play an essential role in an individual’s growth and development, and it is through a safe and nurturing relationship with your home you can build safe and nurturing relationships with yourself and others.

“Just know you’re not alone 
‘Cause I’m going to make this place your home”

Totes what my home/hood is like:


Three Helpful Books

  • Unexpectedly helpful books (Non-fiction):

“The Life Purpose Playbook.” by Judy Machado-Duque

A combination workbook/planner/goal-setting tool/COLORING BOOK! Makes the difficulties of planning more fun than a chore. I had so much fun making the vision board (pictured above), that I ran out of room and just haaad to make another one (also pictured above).

And if your daily calendar page looks like this, who cares!??


“The Woman’s Comfort Book: A Self-Nurturing Guide for Restoring Balance in Your Life” by Jennifer Louden.

OMG I LOVE THIS BOOK SO MUCH. Particularly the fact that there is a helpful chart matrix in the middle where you can locate how you are feeling (i.e. lonely, ugly, nervous, exhausted, whatever) and then trace your finger over to the multiple recommended chapters for helping with that emotion.  Each short chapter includes a variety of different suggestions, so you can find one that works for you.  Great reference tool! I’ve used this book since high school.


“The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up: The Japanese Art of Decluttering and Organizing” by Marie Kondo.

Not specifically about depression/anxiety, but I did find it really helpful. It gave me achievable goals that I could accomplish in stages that resulted in visual, environmental, and mental benefits.  After all, cleansing your past, saying goodbye to old, painful memories, and having an aesthetically pleasing living space are all refreshing, invigorating, and crucial to happiness and the healing process.  I have a copy if you want to borrow. 🙂

Now my closet is at least half as full, my storage is maximized, and finding/putting away clothes is so easy!